Facing Doubts

Just this past week, McRae has added some new words to his vocabulary.  We hear them most frequently when he doesn't want to do something--like go to bed.  They're not naughty words by any means, but for some reason when I hear them, they may as well be.  My heart just gets sad....I don't know--pregnancy hormones?  Over-reacting?  Quite possibly.  "The words", you ask?  Ah, the infamous words are, "I can't."  Those two measly words are like fingernails on a chalkboard to this mother.  I don't care for those words a whole lot and I've worked pretty hard to rid them from my vocabulary altogether.  (And especially my thinking!)  So, where did he learn that from?  I've analyzed and over-analyzed anything that Brian and I say, and I'm pretty sure he didn't learn it from us--thankfully--but he's still learned it from somewhere!

The thing that breaks my heart the most about it is that it seems the moment you start believing you can't do something, you quit being a kid.  I mean, that is the magic of childhood and innocence, right?  Believing you can be or do anything your heart desires.  Only grumpy teens and grown-ups give in to the notion that "they can't."

I'm sure I've way over-analyzed this, but it has given me some precious moments of quiet reflection.  Particularly about how I am--as a mother--going to teach my children that they CAN do anything they set their mind to do--provided they're willing to put forth the effort required.  If I had to pick the most precious truth I've learned in the past 14 months or so, it would definitely be this...that with the Lord's help, I can do anything.  Nothing is beyond my reach.  It might require a lot of work, sacrifice, blood, sweat, tears and possibly/probably some pain before I get there, but that will just make reaching my destination that much sweeter in the end.  I guess I always knew this, but I didn't really know it.  Does that make sense?  I don't think any truth has been as life-altering for me as this one has.  And because I've experienced the joy that comes from this knowledge, I naturally want my children to have it to.

So, how do I best teach it?  By continuing to challenge myself, by setting righteous goals and working towards them--never giving up until they're met and not stopping once they are.  To keep progressing.  So, what does all this mean?  A lot of hard work and dedication on my part, which I know will be exhausting at times, but it is absolutely necessary for them to see me succeeding and triumphing over doubt and fear and things that just seem "hard".  And someday...when they face their own battles (because some day their challenges will be greater than just going to bed when they don't want to), they'll see that person in the mirror and know with unwavering faith that they can do anything they set their mind to do.  And "I can't" will be forever absent from their way of thinking and their speech...once and for all!